But no more giving shady hints to what I'm talking about.
My financial situation has become such that it may be impossible for me to stay here any longer. I am facing student loan repayments, and when I have paid all fixed costs, I will only have about $30 USD left over every week.
That said, I am trying to negotiate a more comfortable salary with my school, but I have also considered and begun looking for jobs in the US that would provide a more stable living, as well as jobs here in Mexico.
If I leave, the lessons I have learned here will be ones that I never forget. I am worried that I'll miss the new friendships I have built here and face feelings of regret, but at the same time, perhaps I'll be able to come back one day with a better understanding of how things will be and what my rights are. To that part let's say I lost the negotiations during my interview for this job. Perhaps I should've studied business a bit and realized how to keep a skeptical eye on what is being put on the table before me.
I write with more confidence than I've ever had in my life. I am certain could be an interpreter now and even interpret from Spanish to German and vice versa without passing through the English barrier. I have lost about 18 pounds and hope to continue losing weight. I have learned to seek my own happiness rather than find it in other people. I have learned the Mexican City subway system. I can use formal language in Spanish to teach a class or have a slang conversation with the taco vendor in the street. I know how to talk to almost anyone.
So what have I lost? Nothing. What will I lose by returning to Kentucky? I don't know. I really don't. That's what scares me. I'm not sure what to do. I'm not sure what will make me happiest. But I have found myself to be adaptable and know that I will rise to whatever challenges face me.
~Buster
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